Almost four years ago to the date, a good work "friend" was close to getting the fired. Her manager wanted her gone so bad, she was trying everything in the book to get her to quit. She excluded her from all projects; ignored her at every opportunity; gave her work terrible markings; spoke poorly of her character and ability; put her on a 30-day (to firing) probation, and even swore at her in person and via email. On of the crazy heifer's last tactics was by way of some written insanity to the effect of:
"If you want to stay here, then over the course of the next 30 days, I need to show it. Matter of fact, PROVE it to me. I want to hear you say how much you love working here and how much this work means to you!"
You see, while my friend was not a Cocoa Girl, she was just as brown as many of us and probably the most-popular person to work at the firm, ever. So, this ‘mom and pop shop; PR firm was scared sh!tless about cutting her ass and getting sued.
One day as her formerly-an-actress VP was wiping fake tears while saying that she is "so terribly sorry" that things were not working out, girly dead-panned and told her that she was not quitting without a) cash and b) a clean employment record.
Chick stopped the show and they reached an agreement, but the madness didn't stop there.
The firm agreed to write off her position, but demanded that she participate in a company-sponsored going away party FOR HER, thrown by (none other) than her coke-head/heroin-addicted manager (top paragraph). Next, they told her that she needed to make an announcement at the next staff meeting that she was QUITTING to pursue greener pastures. Mind you, girly did not even have a clue of what life held for her next.
Ya'll know Cocoa was like "Hell to the nah!!!!" but the friend agreed because she just wanted it all to be over.
If there is anything that I do not like it is f’d up employers getting away with being f’d up. That's why I was all the way thrilled to hear about the battle brewing between Star "F*ck this Job and You!" Jones-Reynolds and one step off trifling Barbara "Losing Popularity" Walters.
In case you live under a rock and haven't a clue about what's going on, The View basically fired Star, but wanted her to tell the world (a lie) that she actually decided to end her stint on the show. Star said beyotches, please! and dropped the bomb on Tuesday’s show – a month off from the timing deemed appropriate by her employer. The same day People magazine featured an exclusive interview from Star, where she broke down all the REAL details of what happened to her career on the show. The next day, there is this media war of sorts going on with Walters telling the whole world she fired Star after Tuesday’s show and that Star should have chosen to take the high road…Yadda, yadda, yadda.
Now, I'm not a fan of Star, but Cocoa is glad that she basically told them all 'fuck you – you and you!' on national TV. Why they would delude themselves into thinking that she would play the game according to their rules is beyond me. Fame, fortune or not, there is a way to treat EVERYONE and they fucked her over! Not to mention that they hired her arch nemesis Rosie O before Star even had the chance to start her “I’ve decided to leave” buzz. Now they want to get all mad? Puleez. YOU GO STAR - stand up for yourself, girlfriend!
As for my friend not standing up for herself? Cocoa took care of that one. Let's just say that the PR diva in me leaked a few leads of my own stating what really went down with my friend’s departure. She was embarrassed that somebody told everyone the truth (I denied it like Kobe, ya’ll), BUT the entire firm was on her side and angry with the skuzzy hoes in management. Image may not seem like a lot to the average person, but to a PR firm built on an image of lies and deceit, their asses were too-through and left trying to damage-control like a mug. I still laugh about it all to this day.