Friday, June 30, 2006

On making a famed departure...

Almost four years ago to the date, a good work "friend" was close to getting the fired. Her manager wanted her gone so bad, she was trying everything in the book to get her to quit. She excluded her from all projects; ignored her at every opportunity; gave her work terrible markings; spoke poorly of her character and ability; put her on a 30-day (to firing) probation, and even swore at her in person and via email. On of the crazy heifer's last tactics was by way of some written insanity to the effect of:

"If you want to stay here, then over the course of the next 30 days, I need to show it. Matter of fact, PROVE it to me. I want to hear you say how much you love working here and how much this work means to you!"

You see, while my friend was not a Cocoa Girl, she was just as brown as many of us and probably the most-popular person to work at the firm, ever. So, this ‘mom and pop shop; PR firm was scared sh!tless about cutting her ass and getting sued.

One day as her formerly-an-actress VP was wiping fake tears while saying that she is "so terribly sorry" that things were not working out, girly dead-panned and told her that she was not quitting without a) cash and b) a clean employment record.

Chick stopped the show and they reached an agreement, but the madness didn't stop there.

The firm agreed to write off her position, but demanded that she participate in a company-sponsored going away party FOR HER, thrown by (none other) than her coke-head/heroin-addicted manager (top paragraph). Next, they told her that she needed to make an announcement at the next staff meeting that she was QUITTING to pursue greener pastures. Mind you, girly did not even have a clue of what life held for her next.

Ya'll know Cocoa was like "Hell to the nah!!!!" but the friend agreed because she just wanted it all to be over.

If there is anything that I do not like it is f’d up employers getting away with being f’d up. That's why I was all the way thrilled to hear about the battle brewing between Star "F*ck this Job and You!" Jones-Reynolds and one step off trifling Barbara "Losing Popularity" Walters.

In case you live under a rock and haven't a clue about what's going on, The View basically fired Star, but wanted her to tell the world (a lie) that she actually decided to end her stint on the show. Star said beyotches, please! and dropped the bomb on Tuesday’s show – a month off from the timing deemed appropriate by her employer. The same day People magazine featured an exclusive interview from Star, where she broke down all the REAL details of what happened to her career on the show. The next day, there is this media war of sorts going on with Walters telling the whole world she fired Star after Tuesday’s show and that Star should have chosen to take the high road…Yadda, yadda, yadda.

Now, I'm not a fan of Star, but Cocoa is glad that she basically told them all 'fuck you – you and you!' on national TV. Why they would delude themselves into thinking that she would play the game according to their rules is beyond me. Fame, fortune or not, there is a way to treat EVERYONE and they fucked her over! Not to mention that they hired her arch nemesis Rosie O before Star even had the chance to start her “I’ve decided to leave” buzz. Now they want to get all mad? Puleez. YOU GO STAR - stand up for yourself, girlfriend!

As for my friend not standing up for herself? Cocoa took care of that one. Let's just say that the PR diva in me leaked a few leads of my own stating what really went down with my friend’s departure. She was embarrassed that somebody told everyone the truth (I denied it like Kobe, ya’ll), BUT the entire firm was on her side and angry with the skuzzy hoes in management. Image may not seem like a lot to the average person, but to a PR firm built on an image of lies and deceit, their asses were too-through and left trying to damage-control like a mug. I still laugh about it all to this day.

Cocoa Girl

29 comments:

i like liquor and tv said...

That whole Star Jones situation makes me wonder what really happened with the Asian chick and that Greek chick that used to work there. I think they both claimed that they wanted to pursue other opportunities.

Barbara is supposed to be replacing Elisabeth too. I think she wants to replace her with a young Latina chick. I bet Elisabeth's excuse will be "I'm leaving the show so I can spend more time with my baby"

Cocoa Girl said...

"Young latina"

Bet.

I could not imagine why she would not get one. They are not at all represented on TV. I'd imagine she'd be more like Eva or the chick from Hutch and Training Day (can't think of her name) than J-Lo or Alba....

If they get a true Latina, then they sidestep "racial" claims that could come with firing Star...

Knockout Zed said...

Her name is Eva Mendes and she's tied up in my basement.

I'm not a Star fan either, but I'm rooting for her like a muthaf!cka.

KZ

Nichelle said...

I think that, like many black professionals, instead of being on "Team Star" or "Team Babs" I'm on "Team Black Professional."

We've seen this game played before. Many of us have been accused of not being a "team player" of being "ungrateful" at such a benevolent boss/massa that only wanted to "protect" us. We've been accused of not "knowing our place" and warned against "burning bridges."

Been there! Done that!

The danger with the Star situation is that black professionals have to watch their backs even more now.

We've got to be on time, save those emails, C.Y.A. like of mofo at all times! Save our money and never be stuck. Always be ready for the next move...

Cocoa Girl said...

LOL Zed. Eva Mendes is cute.

BTW, I meant to say that Latinas are not at all represented on talk TV.

Nichelle - I cosign and say AMEN to your entire comment.

That "ungrateful" "Massa" stuff always gets me. I am dealing with that crap right now at the hands of some should-not-be-a-boss.

Diva (in Demand) said...

Nichelle said it...Team Black Professional. She will always be remembered for sticking it to em on her terms. Gotta love it

Cocoa Girl said...

Yes, Diva. We must love it.

BTW, ya'll (after you leave a comment here...LOL!) check out Miz JJ's hotness on adding the verb "Star Jones" to the lexicon...

http://abitofeverythingbymizjj.blogspot.com/

T. Cas said...

Zed got Eva this week, next week she's mine.

I guess Star should be worrying about her next gig. I don't think she wanna end up hosting a talk show on BET. I hope she don't get BLACK-balled, although a nice little sabattical from her wouldn't be bad either. Her voice just annoys the hell outta me.

mrs.tj said...

Jerks!
Holla!

Miz JJ said...

I am glad she blew up the spot and didn't let them dictate the terms. You just know that would have blown up in her face.

Blah Blah Blah said...

I just emailed you.

This was scandalous...YIKES at your company...lol

The Sarccastik Variable Why said...

i'm not jones fan either but kudos to her...she decided to let the fans know on tuesday....instead of thursday, walters talkin' like she felt "betrayed" ....bitch pleaze...betray deez!!! star handle your busines...

Cocoa Girl said...

T.Cas - I never knew Eva was so popular with the brothers. She does look a truckload better than J-Lo...so I suppose.

Mrs TJ - You're BET awards recap was hilarious!

Miz JJ - Daps, girl *daps*

BBB - PR firms and media/entertainment are the worst when it comes to some gully firing/quitting shyt. Can't beat their sheyot with a bat!

BTW, I can't check my email until I'm at home:( CIA-style firewalls, girl...

Sarccastik - She had to go out on her terms. They would have let her lie to the world, then turn around and tell the truth, saying they DID NOT TELL HER TO LIE!

Star ain't no fool. They were totally trying to set her up to destroy her career.

The Business is dirty...real dirty. You'd be amazed at how people will slaughter another over their bruised egos and vindictiveness.

Single Ma said...

'fuck you – you and you!' on national TV.

BAAAAA HAAAA HAAAA

This whole SJ drama is hi-la-ri-ous! They knew a sista wasn't goin out like dat!

nikki said...

i'm not an sj fan either but i applaud what she did and how she did it. i also give you props for having your girl's back. i wish more folk in the work environment stuck together like that.

star basically had abc and the view and barbara walters in particular looking like vindictive and lying fools. meanwhile, this move probably burned all kinds of bridges for her cuz i don't see another national channel hiring her when she's not the 'quiet retiring' negro they need in order to get away with the heinous shit.

i like liquor and tv said...

Oh no, Eva Mendes? The chick is a known hoe.

chica said...

I found you through Single Ma and have been lurking for a minute. However, your post on SJR compelled me to step in and join the conversation.

I totally agree with the "Team Black Professional" comment. Yes, Star's bridezilla antics were over the top...and gave "The View" more buzz than it ever had. Even now, why would anyone even talk about the show? Seriously?

I understand that Rosie has a built in audience and that works in entertainment, but the only reason I even watched the show for a moment was to see how she shrank before our eyes. I'm not checking for Rosie unless she slaps Elisabeth.

One more thing...did I miss the memo that this show was the best daytime show on the tele? She was fired. Big whoop. She'll cool her heels, invest well, and chat over this months from now while she and Al shop for shoes.

Thanks for letting me participate. I won't be so long winded next time.

Cocoa Girl said...

Thanks for stopping by Chica. Long-winded? Have you seen my posts?!! LOL

For real...I'm checking for your shopping for shoes comment. How astute:)

Cocoa Girl said...

Thanks for stopping by Chica. Long-winded? Have you seen my posts?!! LOL

For real...I'm checking for your shopping for shoes comment. How astute:)

911 said...

The patience of your homegirl is crazy, to hell with being professional....how did she not make at least one scene....props for that though....Star...I never watched, no real feelings, from the sound of it she most of did her way how can yougo wrong with that.....1

Eggplant_Pulverizer said...

team star!

I recently had the pleasure of sticking it to an Sicilian eggplant (they are NOT, I repeat, NOT WHITE! That OLIVE skintone reflects the NORTH AFRICAN blood running through his veins, and they DESPISE it!).

I was offered a position at a big company at the conclusion of a temp assignment. IN HIS MIND, I was supposed to be so hard-up for money and employment so as to overlook the subtle indignities and low balling antics.

The look on his face was PRICELESS, just like how Star jacked Barbara on live T.V.

My dignity is a lot more important than what MASSA thinks! If you don't stand up for yourself, I hope you don't think somone else will!

Go Star!

solitaire said...

Everybody and they mama blogging about this (well...Black folks anyway)... I need to get down on this!

Sis - have I ever told you I love your writing? Well, if I haven't... NOW I HAVE! (laughs)

After this fiasco, you KNOW sisters are watching their back, trying to stay from being 'star jonesed' at work!! (thanks Miz JJ for that!)

Miss Ahmad said...

i feel like had Star been a nicer person and not had all of that fat back hanging out of her dress when she did the red carpets that year, she would have been able to get a little bit more support....
1
God does not like ugly

Harlem Songstress said...

LOL Miss ahmad!!!!

Great post Cocoa...that is absolutely insane what happened to your friend. The sad part is incidenta like that is jsut "business as usual" for some.

It takes so much energy to plot and conspire to bring someone down....if only we used our powers for good......

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