Wednesday, September 13, 2006

You had questions, Cocoa's got answers!

i like liquor and tv said...
What's your favorite food? Pretty much anything spicy, Thai or Indian.

Have you ever beat anyone up?
Katina Jackson in the girl’s locker room senior year. I was co-captain of the cheerleading squad and she was a member. Needless to say, I got kicked off the squad after I kicked her azz in front of about 20 spectators. We started in the locker room and moved it into the gym during the guys’ basketball practice (a strategic move by Cocoa, so Miss Jackson’s beat down would be put on serious blast!)

Did you used to like Oaktown 3-5-7? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah…
Yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah!

Anonymous 12:16pm said... You seem to hang out with a lot of snobby people....are you one of "those" black people... You know, you think you're better than the rest of us?
Cocoa is the same kind of black as you, baby. However, to answer you q, I am one of those black people. I am also one of those black folks who won't hesitate to cold tell you off if you cut off my moms AND one of those who will shoot a man the look of death should he fail to hold a door open for me or any other lady or elderly in my party.

Take from it what you like...

Harlem Songstress said... Have you ever stolen anything? If you answered yes-what was it, and how did u do it?!
Question not precise enough, so I get to say NO.

Thanks for playing!

Anonymous said...
Do you have any regrets in life? And if so, what are your biggest?
I regret that I did not attend Brown, although I was offered a “full ride” by the athletic department (offered to comp me based on my academics).

I regret not having a relationship with the sperm donor. Early experiences with the opposite sex set the stage for a looong time to come. I am still trying to get over some serious stuff. Brothers, please take this one seriously.

1969 said...
Cocoa...are you dating anyone at the moment? Yeah, I'm nosy!
No, she is not (*sobbing uncontrollably*). For real, I am actually on dating hiatus, which can last anywhere from two weeks to two years. All dependent upon how nutty/psychotic/far from normal the last guy was.

Do you plan on staying in NY for much longer or is Philly reaching out to you? :)
God is in control, but I just don’t know how much longer NYC is gonna be my place of residence. I have this strong urge for normalcy on the brain and it keeps saying stuff like North Carolina… and Philadelphia… I think I romanticize the two places, because they represent a life settled to a Minnesota girl currently living in Harlem.

Must have item for Fall? Solid direction. A book deal. Peace with God and my moms. Oh, a banging pair of purple or plum suede stilettos would seal the deal, too!

Harlem Songstress said...
What do you feel are your struggles when it comes to "living your religion"?
My biggest struggle is potentially having to give up on desires that I have always dreamed of. I say “potentially,” because there is a very strong chance that what I want might be outside of God’s will for me. In a nutshell, if I am truly “living my religion” then I should 1) believe He has a plan for me and 2) pray to know it AND accept it over my own plans. Right?

JaySpice said...
I'm new to the site. What did you have surgery for?
Welcome JaySpice (love that name!). I had a myomectomy, which is a common surgery especially for African American women.

meltron3000 said...
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?
Some type of living thing is there to hear it, so yes. Hell, even roaches run upon hearing noises…um, so I hear… :D

What does blue smell like?
Like the color red…

If Mr Smith's peacock lays an egg in Mr Jones' yard, who owns the egg?
Was the peacock breaking and entering?

Is noon AM or PM?
Depends on midnight’s status, mane!

Knockout Zed said...
I can't ask. Or better yet, I won't ask. I'd rather be shown.
I swear up and down that my imagination is vivid. Yet, I KNOW that it is not vivid enough for this …

Pam said...
I really enjoy your blog. Your tone comes thru in your writing and puts me in such a better mood. (Thanks Pam – glad to be of service!)

How long do you plan to keep writing in this forum?
I love communicating with people, so I would like to maintain this platform for as long as I can! Depending on where life takes me, I may or may not have time to keep it up.

My youngest sister seems alot like you, adventurous, loves challenges and very precise (read Anal retentive) all of which characteristics I envy. When do you plan to become your bosses boss? (smile)
You know, as much as I complain about working for others, I do not fantasize about one day running my own shit. True, I do not like reporting into petties, crazies or morons, but lawd knows that I sure as hell do not want to manage the mofos either!

If Cocoa can’t beat ‘em, then don’t let me manage ‘em!

I am too exact to allow someone else to work under me. There are few folks who can pick up on and emulate my insanity. All of my direct supervisors have been hella anal retentive, almost psychotic. I am too.

And finally, what will settle you down?
A fine ass man who is spiritual, ambitious and is crazy about me who asks to be my husband and desires a strong family unit with no less than three kids, a few animals, and a place called home.

A cocoa girl can dream, right?

Single Ma said...
When are you coming thru DC so I can meet Ms Cocoa Fabulous?
Hopefully before the end of year!

When are you dropping that novel?
Good question. I have a few more leads to exhaust with publishing houses and agents. If they don’t go anywhere, then I may need to look to self publishing. BTW, thanks for the forwardJ

I apologize if I'm making assumptions, but why Ms Cocoa aint got no man?
Because I have not been looking – seriously. I am not at all trying to sound self-righteous, but I do not really put the effort into meeting men that I should.

I know that I am approaching 30 with strong desires of marrying and building a family (in that order!), but I definitely feel as though I do not put in the effort that I should to go out and meet the opp sex. Got any ideas…please share!

Have you ever tried "Something New?" *wink*
I have…once. He was very nice looking, obtaining his M.B.A., living on the UWS and all that. Yet, something was a little off.

Long story short, Cocoa was able to determine (rather quickly) that dude was a negraphile, meaning that he only dated black women. No white; no Indian; no Latina…nothing but black. Still, I was willing to give him a chance, until he felt comfortable enough to comment (during date #1) on how black men “always seem to date white women below their level/that white men do not want,” while white men only grab the crème de la crème of the black stock.

Has Cocoa made this same comment before? Hell yeah, but I am black! There was just something off about his level of comfort and the fact that his comment seemed a bit much rooted in spite.

Did you "really" return that skirt and those shoes? ;-)
I did! Yesterday!!! I’se now $259 less broke!

Are you a bougie ghetto girl in denial? Ha!
Unfortunately, not. I am just bourgie. I only did “ghetto” up until about 9 years of age and that was only because my b.f.f.’s happened to be the five “BeBe” kids next door. When they moved (their 21-year-old mother Mildred died of a crack overdose), my dealings with the ghettois was over. Actually, it may have started when their mammy broke into our apartment while we were away on vacation! They robbed my mom and I blind! Even somehow managed to remove a big floor model TV from the crib!

Crackheads are a determined bunch! A friend of a friend commented that they are the biggest source of untapped labor in the United States, because they will do anything – including work any job – to get their next hit.

Okay…serious digression.

If you had one wish that was guaranteed to come true within the next 24 hours, what would it be?
I cannot even answer this one…not if I only have one wish.

How much those nukkas makin on the trading floor?
Depends. First-year analysts (straight outta college) pull down a $55-$70K base and can earn just as much come year end via a bonus. So, a top salary for first-years is about $120,000 or so.

Associates who come directly from B-school start with a base of about $110K, which varies according to their product group. Their bonuses are less easy to predict…could be anywhere from $9k to $129k to $150k…

Anon @ 8:34 said…
Do you have a weave? Do you shake it like a Polaroid picture?
Funny that you should ask. I actually plan on getting one right before I head back to work in a few weeks (not that Cocoa is trying to deceive her unknowing colleagues or anything like soJ

T.Cas said…
Are you doing some writing while you are recovering?
Yes and no. I am trying to get back on the blog. HOWEVER, I was looking over my manuscript notes the other day and do plan on tweaking some more chapters before I go back into the trenches!

Do you see yourself as the "settling down" type? You know husband and 2.5 kids?
I actually have never seen myself in any other way, shape or form. I did not grow up with the intact family (mom, dad, etc.), so a strong family unit has always been a goal of mine.

What is the wackest pick up line anyone has used on you?
Dayum…there are SO many…

“Gul…you thick as SHIT!”
“Hey, mami…I can see your p*ssy through your pants,” followed by a kissing sound (I just cringed again and this one happened years ago).

Just a hazard of living in NYC!

What is the best pick up line anyone has used on you?
Sadly enough, but he was not black. This something-new stepped to me in the campus Laundromat and told me I was beautiful. Asked if he could take me to lunch. Just a simple compliment and a simple line.

Cocoa Girl


meltron3000 said...

2 out of 4 correct.


Miz JJ said...

Interesting answers. I can't believe I missed the chance to ask you a question. Damn.

simplycomplex said...

"“Hey, mami…I can see your p*ssy through your pants,” followed by a kissing sound"

That is appalling!!

Oh and I love the blog!!!

Knockout Zed said...

Girl, you is thick as shit!


inciquay said...

Nice post. I always miss the ones where you have Q&A or music trivia :-(

Cocoa Girl said...

Whatev Meltron!

Miz JJ and Inciquay - Puleez. Ask away, I don't mind answering past deadline...LOL

Wow! Two Candians in one day - to what/who do I owe this honor? :)

Simplycomplex - Love your name and welcome! Yes, I swear the little "Mexican" construction worker types are the absolute worst.

KZ - Whatever!

i like liquor and tv said...

lol@ you 'bout it. ..going around beating people up

My fav pick up line: Can I buy you a drink? That gets me all excited and tingly.

meltron3000 said...


It's ok.

PAM said...

Thank you for answering my ??'s. You really are awesome.
P.S. 3 kids, Girl im warning you now if the first 2 aint a boy dont do it a third time, TRUST ME!!!

Single Ma said...

Very interesting...

But at least you're honest.

Cocoa Girl said...

LQ - True dat! LOL. At least many guys here in NYC do know what's up with the drink. Kind of unrelated, but the Something New's are on point when it comes to this lost art.

Meltron - Right back at cha! ;-)

Pam - You're welcome and thanks again. So very sweet of you. BTW, three kids ain't nada...

I used to want 7.

Cocoa Girl said...

SingleMa - Always been a major goal of mine (honesty).

I figure that if I cannot accept myself then who can/will. I also have never been a big fan of going with the flow for the sake of fitting in. (used to be) One of my biggest problems on the job...

T. Cas said...

Wow at those pick up lines. That is crazy.

and let me find out that cocoa can throw them bows. I never would have expected you beating up the cheerleader.

Miss Ahmad said...

nice read although i missed the questions. your readers were a bit more colorful in their questions. i may have had too many rules on mine!

i like liquor and tv said...

rofl@ cocoa, you ain't neva lied. Me and a Something New got tore UP at a bar around the corner a couple weeks back. Them Something New's be begging you to drink.

Cocoa Girl said...

T.Cas - I haven't thrown the bows since then. I wonder if that is a skill that lessens without use?

Miss Ahmad - I actually like the fact that your readers asked real questions. I may have needed more rules:)

LQ - The SN's don't play when it comes to the drinks! And they love to buy for pretty women! Actually, I think they might be that generous with any girl in the crew.

kesha_nc said...

Hi Cocoa, love your blog. If you move to NC, whereabouts would you stay? I'm a born and raised Carolinian, and have lived in both Raleigh and Charlotte (currently Charlotte).

Anonymous said...

Oh yeah, I got kicked off the cheerleading squad in high school for fighting, too. I was also the co-captain. Never made it to varsity b/c of that BS. But it was a lesson learned, and I came back to school after suspension with the nickname "Tyson" - the heavyweight KO Tyson, not the ear-biting chump! :)

kesha_nc said...

Oops, it didn't post my name with the cheerleading anecdote (it was me, kesha_nc)

Cocoa Girl said...

Hey Kesha -

LOL about the cheerleading. I wanted to beat her up even more afterwards, but they told us that if we were suspended one more time, then we could not walk at graduation! It would have broken my mom's heart, so I backed down.

NC, huh? I think I would try Charlotte or Durham. You must love it there? Have you been to NYC?

kesha_nc said...

I think NC's a good place to live. I just moved to Charlotte last year, and I like it better than Raleigh, which is where I went to college. Durham is kinda dangerous, only drive THROUGH it to get where I need to go. I have been to NYC earlier this year for my birthday. It was my first trip there, so I'd like to visit again soon.