Wednesday, September 17, 2008

When Beckies Attack

It's official, do not trust anybody named Becky, Amanda or Jen ESPECIALLY at work. Never!

Don't get Cocoa wrong - or get it twisted - it's not that I trust anyone on the job. Rather, more or less, I just don't give a damn in varying degrees. For example, brown-girl-me may let Susie Q. know that I'm not a fan of Bob Cobb's antics. Yet, whether Susie stays mum is neither here or there por moi. Once spoken, I detach from my words pretty easily. So it doesn't ruffle my feathers if somebody else wants to try them on for size.

What does irk the brown off me, however, are plain 'ol crazy, get-ahead-by-any-means-even-if-it-only-means-a-promo-to-head-shelf-duster mofos who would sever your throat for a pause-length pat on the back. Enter Becky...whose REAL name actually is Becky, ya know. Coincidental? Cocoa thinks not.

It's only week 5 and this chick has already tried to throw me under the Mack truck. NO exaggeration. Long story short, I recently joined her team to help its members with several market tours. At first, she suspciously held onto all projects but started trying to toss me a few bones once things began slipping through the cracks. Yesterday she delegates to me a new project (which I was supposed to be doing any damn way!) and asks that I send her a draft. I sent it to her. Then, chicky wanted me to stop by her desk for commentary/feedback...on a templated-paragraph, ya'll! Um...I. did. not. go. Heck, I was swamped, too! So, she wrote me back (key mental note) and stated that we could meet in the morning and distribute the draft.

La Manana comes and chica sends me some irate, faux-upset email about how the task was urgent and needed to be handled right away AND accused me of not managing my time effectively...all in writing! She basically tried to paint me a lazy you-know-what who failed to negotiate a deadline. Whether in anger or sheer stupidity, senorita forgot one important fact: her heiferish-behind emailed me - with smileys! -stating that the project was not a rush. Sooo...all I had to do is respond with utter "confusion" and gladly redirect her gaze toward our email chain from the previous its entirety!

Aww, yes...cut and paste is Cocoa's latest BFF, that is, right after my girl 'CC.'

It's kind of sad, though. I cannot for the life of me figure out what made this Becky go bananas! I do not have ANY hopes or desires to get promoted into her spot, nor am I competitive with this chick. *smdh* ya'll...*smdh.*

Cocoa, La Clueless